When my friends leave half-empty (or half-full if you’re an optimist) water bottles at my house, my mom collects them and makes me drink them. 

Second day in Beijing

The first day was mostly uneventful. We landed on a mostly clear, sunny day. Beijing is what I expected and also not. But I think that’s the way it is with most things. It’s not a dystopian, pollution-ridden black hole. Our program coordinator and her son, Duke took us out to delicious hot pot for dinner. In my Chinese class at Syracuse, there was a chapter dedicated entirely to hot pot and its significance at Chinese New Year so it was kind of meaningful to be experiencing it. Hot pot is mostly the same—the pot is a lot more glamorous with a cone shaped burner in the center instead of the electric ones I’m familiar with. Everyone who hears I’m from Los Angeles immediately asks me about the Lakers and why we all hate the Clippers. I feel embarassed that I don’t know more about basketball. 

It’s hard adjusting to the rooms. It’s okay but old. It was lonely but more of the group came in today. D and I went to U Center for lunch, where there’s a Uniqlo and a bunch of other little shops. We had Korean food—bibimbap, seafood udon noodles, and two cups of aloe juice for less than 10 dollars US. We had dinner at school and met the rest of the group that arrived. Most aren’t from Syracuse—which is nice and refreshing to be able to meet other students from other places. We went to La Bamba, a Mexican themed bar and club with all Chinese waiters. Going to bed now, toodles. 


when he licks his lips seductively

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Things I’m afraid to think, much less say but sometimes I can entertain them when it’s dark and my mind wanders a little.

Things I like:
Smoked salmon from Costco at every meal (the wild kind is steeper in price but worthwhile after reading about the difference of wild vs farmed)
Productive days and feeling productive
Kale salad with ponyu dressing, tomatoes, avocados, and aforementioned salmon
Sunny, 70 degree weather
My Gilman finally dispersing (thank you!!!)
Pinkberry perfection achieved today—mango, honey granola, Mochi, yogurt chips (and it was free)
Driving again (it’s still scary and most of it comes naturally but I feel like I’m 16 again sometimes and forget if I can turn on red lights and stuff) but driving freedom is a huge privilege
Getting my VISA approved
Getting my renewed license after waiting for over two weeks
Season 4 downton

Peanut throwing up
Bleached fav Zara pants
Everyone around me with serious sniffles
Oreos not tasting the same with almond milk ( I know, okay?)

Always happy that the bad is small and insignificant and the good is so long.

Hoping this is one of my last tumblr posts of the year and that my wordpress blog can be a real thing. It’s one of my resolutions and with my study abroad trip coming up in a month, I hope that I’ll have some real blog-worthy content. 

Turned 21 and now I can buy that grapefruit beer that I want now. Except that my ID hasn’t come in yet and the one I’m working with now is expired and I am 15 and a half in that picture. New Years always makes you reflect and ponder on the year and the first few months were really rough for me. I hit a really low point around January last year. I felt pretty isolated and alone—I would wake up feeling depressed and have to gradually shake it off. I would feel fine throughout the day and I would be getting coffee and it would hit me. Instantly I would feel the urge to go home and crawl into bed. It was a weird, scary time but I worked through it and I’m not afraid of writing about that experience. I was always lucky enough to have the support of friends and family who told me that feeling this way wasn’t crazy. I knew I had the ability to work through it and I did. I feel way happier and I don’t feel as anxious about everything anymore. For the most part, I feel like things will turn out okay and that I can take things on one at a time. 

On a much lighter, brighter note. The semester flew and it went really well—I decided to go abroad to Beijing. Syracuse and the world has decided to be really generous with my study abroad pursuits—I’m leaving in about a month. I know I will be challenged and pushed (especially given my phobia of public restrooms) but I genuinely think I will come out of it so much stronger and better. I will be visiting Hong Kong with my roommate and then I will be in Indonesia for two weeks following my program with my Lee Man. I am also going to Dubai next week with Lee Man but that is a whole other story. 

Resolutions to write out to hold myself accountable

-have better posture, reply to text messages, drink more water, keep email inboxes under control

I forgot my password for awhile and I have conveniently remembered her right before finals. Life is really really good and I am incredibly lucky. I feel so burnt out from school though and I am simultaneously doing four projects but COM, MAG, and NEW are done. I get to come home in five days and I am thrilled :’) 

(Source: )

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i do

i do

(Source: blua)

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When someone says they’re not hungry


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"I like people too much or not at all."

Sylvia Plath (via h-o-r-n-g-r-y)

(Source: likeafieldmouse)

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